Do you have negative or positive associations with the beginning of the school year?
I'd say usually negative. I did not have a lot of friends in school. My parents moved us around a lot so it was hard to keep in touch with friends and even harder to try to make new friends. I was always afraid of getting close to someone and then having to get up and move. I didnt want to get attached, or invest to much time, emotion in to a relationship. I didnt stop trying to make friends until about 10th grade. I had a best friend (chrissy) and a boyfriend (chris) that i had to leave behind. I was failing classes because i just didnt want to be in school i didnt want to try anymore. So i stopped trying to socialize with people my age, just kept my face in my books, listened to music on my cd player at lunch and sat alone. I much rather prefered it that way, i just observed everyone. I will admit i started to become a little bitter, distrusting and because i wasnt outgoing i also fell into a place where i would not stand up for myself, would not speak up because i just wanted to avoid confrontation at all costs.
The last four years ive slowly started to come out my shell, find myself, and finally speak my mind. I dont let people push me around anymore, if i have a problem i talk about it. I feel like a COMPLETELY different person from when i was 15, even 20. I'm 22 now, dont have a lot of friends but the ones i have are great friends. I do miss some of my friends from my past, and miss the good times we had together but things change i suppose. Everyone grows and sometimes we move in different directions. I will always have those memories though and ill think back on them fondly, at the person i used to be.